…are bigger jeans. You heard me. I was in KS for about a week because my dad had knee surgery, and i didn’t even try to eat/drink better. At one point, my pants were so tight and uncomfortable that I went to Walmart and bought bigger jeans. Why bother trying to get in shape…just buy bigger clothes! As an added bonus, Catie was with me and i had the pleasure of dragging her to the fitting room. Walmart fitting rooms. So grim.
catie: why are we in here?
me: becase mommy needs new jeans
catie: mommy what are those lines on your legs?
me: they’re from my other jeans, they’re too small so they’re digging in
catie: is it because you’re fat?
me: …no, it’s because i’m lazy and haven’t been running or eating right lately
catie: you should run more so you can keep up with me
at this point my immediate thought was “STFU stupid kid! I KNOW! None of this is news!!” I instead chose to say nothing.
catie: what are THOSE jeans?
me: they’re my mom jeans. they’re the jeans that moms wear when they give up trying to look good and just embrace a bigger body
catie: can we go to the zoo now?
So, yeah. Bigger jeans. Never again. I felt like a big fat fuck. Came home on Sunday, drank the last beers, ate the last of the junk food, and started the size-reduction process today.
food:
1/2 bagel w/ avocado
coffee w/ milk
1 apple
1 slice of mushroom pizza and iced tea
salad with quinoa, steak, strawberries, etc.
chocolate milk
activity:
push-ups
dips
let-me-ins
laundry (a lot of laundry)
I’m not offended that you bought bigger jeans but that you bought them at Wal-Mart.
the shame. the deep, immense shame. $17.88 of it.